Angela M. MacDonald - First UMC in Birmingham, MI

02:48 am: Angela is going to unplug.....

It just dawned on me that this time last week I was in Birmingham, Michigan.  That Friday night, I had a great dinner with the Evans' and began a zillion edits and practices of my Sunday sermon.  What a difference a week makes....and it is strange!

This past Tuesday morning, I drove out at about 5:30am and arrived in North Carolina about 5:30 that evening.  I left the state of 'Michigan Lefts' to re-enter the state where NOBODY knows how to merge correctly.....ahh love!

I am adjusting to home in North Carolina. I learned a few years ago that 'home' for Angela is wherever Angela is located.  So, when people ask me, "Where is home for you, Angela?" I usually say, "wherever I am paying rent or a mortgage." 

Next week, I'm headed to St. Louis for a few days and for a few reasons.

1.  My cousin lost his 15 year old stepson in a drowning accident in June.  I am going to hug my cousin.
2.  One of my best friends is being deployed to Iraq in late August.  I am going to hug my college buddy.
3.  My mom has good days and bad days, so we could not meet up in Chicago.  I am going to hug my mom.  
4.  I am a certified Daddy's girl who leaned very heavily on him and my brothers this summer.  So, I am going to hug my daddy.
5.  My nephews are still young enough to like go-carts and I'm not old enough to know any better.  So, I'm going to hug my nephews and we'll go ride go-carts.

After I get my fill of St. Louis, I'll head back to Durham and start year two....YEAH!!!  Year two means that it is NOT year one and therefore progress!

As I transition back to school, I guess this is the best way to end the journey that I've been calling 'my blog thingee'.  

Your prayers are always welcome and appreciated.

Ciao!!!

01:35 pm: Wow and Holy Cow!

Howdy -

Well, I'm ready to go back into my cave now.  It's been a great summer, but I'm going to sleep now...:-)

To find me, my email address is:  amm36@duke.edu.  

My home address:

Angela M. MacDonald - PO Box 2852 - Durham, NC - 27715-2852.

Now, to the important stuff.  From the pulpit, I think the day went well.  I only cried a little bit during the 8:30 service, but managed to hold it together for the 10am.  Thank God!  Under the advisement of Rev. Ann MacDonald [mom], I got most of it out last night, so I hope that the message was meaningful. 

I found the Detroit Tigers baseball hat in the kitchen of the church.  I had been eyeing it for a few weeks, so I dusted it off last night and thought it would make a good visual.  Hooray.  If anyone is looking for it, I've put it back on top of the cabinets.

What I will most remember about this summer is how SPECIAL it has been.  Churches are full of a wide variety of dynamics and I am very glad to have been a part of First UMC - Birmingham.

Honestly, I always asked God to give me a clue about how on earth I would deliver messages to a community as affluent as Birmingham, Michigan.  God consistently reminded me that the messages were for the PEOPLE and not the portfolios.  People need encouragement, rebuke, correction, laughter, wisdom, incentive, insight and a friendly reminder that they are not alone.  I have seen the clergy at FUMC do this and hope to have been helpful in that way as well.  

I get it.

Thank you all so much for letting me hang out!

God Bless!

Angela

08:30 pm: 'S.P.L.A.T' is where it's at!!!

I have just returned from a United Methodist youth convention held in Greensboro, NC.  Before the trip, all I could think about was how nervous I would be as a non-United methodist with twelve teenagers that did not know me very well.  I am humbled as I quickly discovered that God continues to remain in charge of it all and was reminded that the best perspectives on life & church can be seen through the eyes of the youth.

'SPLAT' stands for all of the things that these young adults have now been re-energized to do:  Seek, Pray, Learn, Act & Teach.  The week was full of wonderful speakers, VERY funny intermissions, insightful bible study and very practical information about religion, social issues and methodism.  I became an instant fan of the various sub-genres of Christian music, particularly Christian pop and Christian heavy metal [???].  However, my age did shine through.  Of about ten songs that one group sang, I think I was able to actually hear FIVE words.  One night, I had one of the young adults sings into my ear so that I could actually understand the words to one of the songs that I was trying to enjoy.  I'm starting to think that the phrase 'aging gracefully' may be an oxymoron....:-)

Over 7,000 young adults SPLAT-ing!  It was just wonderful, encouraging, humbling, funny, inspiring, exhausting and envigorating.  The most pivotal moment I witnessed was the night I watched those same 7,000 young adults briskly approach the stage, ball up $10 bills and throw them onto the stage after being told how $10 can buy a mosqito net for an infant in Africa to protect them from the possibility of malaria.  I'm summarizing the moment, but more words would not do that moment much justice. 

I got to watch as twelve young adults from Birmingham, Michigan diligently saught God for their lives.  I got to watch as the adults found extraordinary energy to spend time with these teenagers this past week to make sure that they continue their lives as great stewards, sound decision makers and future Methodist leadership.  Their nightly reflections were mature, compassionate and very introspective.  They are certain to have an incredible impact on the future and were certainly worth the effort.

I cannot wait to see what they'll do next....after I get a really good night's sleep!

Yippeeeeee!!!!!

01:40 am: Pennies from Birmingham.....

Proverbs 22:6 --- Train up a child in the way [s]he should go, and when [s]he is old [s]he will not depart from it.

With the blessing of the senior pastor, the vision of the associate pastor & his wife, the trust of parents and the in-kind benevolence of various church members, a group of young adults from this church made their first trek to the beautiful country of Ghana, West Africa!  Their 2-year initiative, called the 'Penny Project', culminated in this mission trip based on the collection of MILLIONS of pennies.  Pennies!  The currency that the US is trying to eliminate [See: http://www.forbes.com/2002/07/05/0705penny.html].   Pennies!  The currency we most consistently find on the ground.   Pennies!  The currency that has now been translated into smiles and new international relationships.  Pennies! 

I was just proud and excited by their effort and willingness to go.  After all, these young adults have the choice to ship funds abroad, but preferred to deliver it themselves.  I knew they'd never be the same because their hearts and minds were open to receive whatever God showed them....and God did not disappoint!!!

They proved that unity of our worlds is not as difficult as we adults can make it.  Very simply, all of God's children are under the same sky.  Some sleep directly under those stars because they have no homes; some sleep in beds with no parents around to talk & grow with them ; some sleep in exile due to HIV, like the lepers throughout the bible.  I believe that they are truly changed; more appreciative of their blessings and further empowered to BE a blessing.  One penny at a time.

It is always exciting to see God move when we get out of God's way and just let the amazing things happen!

God Bless us all as we use our freedoms to be hearers and DO-ERS of His mighty word!

01:38 am: A Tale of Two Woodwards.....

As the weeks rapidly roll by, I keep being asked about any spiritual gifts that I feel are being more pronounced by this experience.  Without hesitation, I have been reminded of the gift of flexibility.

As I mentioned a few entries ago, I have been able to see Detroit through two different lenses: a financially affluent one and a financially depressed one.  Both worlds are connected by a road named Woodward Avenue.  I have been reminded of the importance of one's personal comfortability in both areas - the ability to be respectful without condescention in one area and the ability to be respectful without being artificial in the other.  God continues to amaze me in showing the ease and tensions of both.  Further, I am amazed at how they are both vital learning environments.

Tonight, I attended a fund raising event in downtown Detroit.  One end of Woodward was raising funds for the continued growth of the other end of Woodward.  Aside from the fantastic environment, I was shown the dependence that these two worlds actually have upon each other.  I saw the fulfillment that one receives in being able to sow financial seeds into the growth of a community.  Simultaneously, I saw the fulfillment that another feels in continuing to expand employment and volunteer opportunities within that disadvantaged community.  Cyclical, important and fulfilling.

I'm enlightened by the dance between the two Woodwards and am expecting God to continue to guide me along with some much needed 'boogie shoes'.

01:45 am: 'The Lord does not give us more than we can handle..."

Yeah. I wonder where that came from. I'm sure someone reading this will tell me. If it wasnt mentioned in any classes this past semester, I have no recall of it...:-)  Just kidding...sort of.

It is one of those sayings that is used in the most awkward of fashions. It is used by those WATCHING the grieving or by those grieving who use it because they do not want to hear it anymore from anyone watching them deal with pain that is unrelatable.

As Sunday begins, I realize that I am 'on' for the liturgical duties of the 8:30 service and am yet restless. I quickly remind myself that ministers can get restless. I am restless tonight because of the news from Ohio regarding the ending of the search of another pregnant woman. I'll refrain from my own speculation because anyone watching the news can do that for themselves. However, I am restless because this news reminds me of my own vulnerability that makes me wonder where I fit in God's kingdom. This story reminds me of the loss of my best friend on March 3, 1999. Her remains were found over 20 days later in a remote area from a metropolitan city....and to this date, no one has been charged. My best friend was 3 months pregnant by a man who intended to marry someone else. As I reflect on my calling in March 2002, I remember that this is the main reason why I repeatedly explained to God that He clearly needed to re-consider Angela. SERIOUSLY. 

As I think that thought, God quickly reminds me that maybe what is in store for ministry will be enhanced by my ability to remember that there will be days when the hole in your heart is big enough to walk through; and maybe I am supposed to walk with someone else. I am reminded that what saved my sanity is that my best friend knew that I loved her. She knew that we would watch Ally McBeal on Monday nights no matter where I lived in the world and that she had to watch 'ER' alone because I thought that show was more drama than necessary. She knew that she would always get a call from me on her birthday and that we would never go more than 3 days without talking. She knew that I went to see movies twice: once with her and once to actually hear the words because she talked through movies so much. Maybe I need to help someone remember those things about their lost loved one when they're ready. I realized that your memories and tears will provide more sanity than you realize; maybe I will be more able to just sit and hold the Kleenex box in those moments. I was once told that I should be 'over it' by now; maybe I am supposed to be around to give credence to the reality that you never really get 'over it', but you do manage to function and find God's love and strength in spite of it. 

Friday was the end of Vacation Bible School. As we all ushered 300 kids out of Avalanche Ranch by noon, we all fought back tears in preparation for a funeral at 1pm of a 27-year old who died very suddenly. Even I could not help the tears despite my only contribution that was hurridly unfolding more chairs to meet the demands of a young, numb, stunned overflow crowd that had already filled the sanctuary and balconies of the church. It reminded me of my beloved cousin that died suddenly at 18. To this day, I experience a range of emotions because I often wonder about the man he would have become and how much I really need his male point of view these days. I am reminded of how our closeness made my aunt drive four hours to deliver the news in person because she knew that the pain would be too overwhelming for me. 

Yeah....the Lord does not give us more than we can handle. But, I am sometimes inclined to run the country and write a reminder in the margins of every Bible that says...Remember - IT DOES GET VERY, VERY, VERY HEAVY. 

Maybe I'm supposed to nonverbally remind them God really does not give one more than they can handle...it just FEELS unbearable at times. It FEELS helpless, it FEELS awful, it FEELS never-ending, it FEELS hopeless, it FEELS like the dictionary has no word for how it FEELS. John Claypool has managed to lasso a lot of those emotions - Thank God, but only after they get past how they FEEL and are ready to open the book. 

Maybe my silent, awkward and sometimes tearful presence can be useful after all....because I'm sure they've already heard that God is not going to give them more than they can handle. 

05:10 pm: "Gain all you can. Save all you can. Give all you can" [John Wesley]

The subject line comes from:  http://gbgm-umc.org/UMW/wesley/serm-050.stm
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Week five's reflections yielded the first ever responses regarding this blog.
I am actually very grateful for the feedback.  The responses were as diverse as my emotions, but isn't that life? 

Despite my wrestling, I am learning how God truly equips us to blossom right where we are planted.

In Jeremiah 29, God gave a reluctant Jeremiah instructions to pass on to a stubborn and offended group of Judeans that were sent to Babylon.  Instructions to equip them to not just ENDURE being out of their comfort zone but to FLOURISH.  Those instructions were based on God given abilities they already possessed.  They just had to realize that God's directions were useful....even in Babylon.  I do not know if they realized it, but the unfamiliar becomes familiar through obedience and growth.  The unfamiliar becomes familiar through obedience and growth.

So, yeah.  I'm good.

'Tuesdays with Tobit' went NOTHING like I had planned...and it was beautiful.
I continue to be grateful that God is so much smarter than me.

Wrestling and blooming and praying....gaining, saving and giving,

Angela

02:39 pm: Mansions and ministry.....?

08:39 am: This is my story....this is my song!
My experience continues to introduce me to amazing people and opportunities on a regular basis these days.  However, my greatest surprise was in what I discovered about myself.

I have talked about my faith journey in details that I never provided to anyone before this summer.  I would avoid it  because I felt that my skills as a listener were more important than my skills as a talker.  I will admit, however, that I am still pretty surprised at learning how sharing my faith journey can be encouraging and inspiring to others.  Stressful and frustrating?  YES!!!  Inspiring?  NEVER!!!  For some reason, I knew it was an important story but never realized that I was included in that equation.  I was even reflecting with my mom who had heard a lot of details for the first time this week and her response was equal amazement.

I had always known of God's movements in my life from my journey through Florida, Texas and Mississippi to the jobs that have taken me all over the US.  I truly realized my 'smallness' in the world through trips to Africa and Haiti.  I felt humbled by His presence when I knew my Calling was inevitable.  I remembered the tears I cried that weekend; not because I was being unmistakably called but because I simply would not have picked Angela.  With all of her flaws, pensiveness, disorganization, apprehension and sometimes analysis paralysis.....I would not have picked Angela.

I was whining yesterday because I simply did not want to do it anymore.  I was done with my okra!  I whined, "I dont want to talk about me anymore!  I want to talk about God!"  Well, it was a few Michgan lefts later that I realized how silly my statement was - because God's presence through this journey of mine is exactly why I need to get comfortable telling the story.  God's presence through this journey is what makes it an alright story to tell.

This week taught me the importance of sharing the journey....the good, the bad and the crazy.  Sometimes it does provide encouragement, permission to be frustrated and shows how even Angela tries to praise her Savior "all the day long".

amm

12:08 pm: When in Rome…..?

08:38 pm: One Triune God

Over the past ten days, First Birmingham has had five funerals.  I got to know a few of them before they passed, while I was able to enjoy the lives of others with stories told through tears of relatives and amazingly tender and poignant eulogies by Rev. Rod.  While it may seem somber at first, we also baptized eight young children this past Sunday.  The combination of the two, truly epitomize how God is Alpha and Omega.

I am thoroughly enjoying this experience, but am a bit sentimental when I think of how quickly this first academic year flew by.  I do miss the new friendships that have been formed.  I also realize how short life is and how important it is to enjoy it.  I have a renewed sense of awareness about how I represent God because I want to be able to leave stories behind, similar to the ones that I've heard of loved ones lost over these past few weeks.  

I was also given an opportunity to witness a United Methodist ordination!!!  It will be a long time before I forget my visual of the array of choir robes that represented churches from the entire conference.For me, that was an incredibly powerful picture of unity.  That picture was solidified by the participation of all of the District Superintendents which allowed for a chance to hear different accents from the same pulpit.  It was truly beautiful to me and I was grateful to have a glimpse into what I truly believe God's Kingdom looks like. 

05:03 pm: Birmingham So Far....

*****DISCLAIMER:  This is edited from my personal journal from yesterday, May 15, 2007******
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As day two comes to a close, I am realizing that some of my background is necessary to really appreciate the amazing things that I have seen in my first few days at First UMC - Birmingham.

For me, transparency is like okra.  It is something that I absolutely, positively do NOT enjoy.  I do not know if it is because I am introvert (INTJ for you Meyers-Briggs fans) or because life as a minister's child required the utmost of diplomacy that typically included a guarded or reserved personality.  Nevertheless, I have found that ministry requires transparency.  I am starting to wonder if transparency is inevitable, especially when it seems that God is equipping my faith journey with some amazing personal testimonies that need to be shared.  Therefore, you and cyberspace will witness my attempts at 'eating some okra'.

My Tuesday began at 8:30am with an all day excursion through downtown Detroit with the Women's Group of FUMC.  Aside from the great stories and fellowship that these women shared with me, I re-affirmed the pursuit of a dual degree (MDiv/MSW) as we toured Cass Community Center (http://www.casscommunity.com).  This center is actually a conglomerate of social services that are provided via vision of the UMC and currently being directed by Rev. Faith Fowler.  We were able to view some of the eight (8) locations that provide a wide range of services to downtown Detroit community.  We viewed homeless facilities, kitchen facilities, the actual Cass Community UMC and a warehouse that is being converted to ultimately provide multiple employment opportunities for the area.  While it seems that downtown Detoit lacks a bit of its infrastructure, the efforts I witnessed today make Cass Community a beacon of light.  I can definitely see that light flickering and others can as well.  FUMC has definitely been instrumental, financially and socially, within that area.

As we drove from the spacious homes at one part of Woodward Avenue to the abandoned buildings (around the community center) at the other part of Woodward, I began to realize the true beauty of this experience.  Woodward Ave. is divided into two parts.  I will get to see and work within both.  Now, I feel as if I am receiving TWO field experiences instead of one!

As we toured these places, I felt humbled and very, very small.  I will have to live with the guilt of fussing at God because my transition from the workplace to student was so abrupt.  I was upset with God because I went from homeowner to renter.  I was upset about the things, the freedom lost with loss of income.  I was some days offended that I went from business traveler to pedestrian.  I have, of course, finished my temper tantrum.  

However, today clearly reminded me of how blessed I am in spite of myself.

It was a great day hangin with the Women's Club. 

09:56 pm: Counting down.....

I know we are not supposed to start our journals until May.  I will actually start my assignment a week early because I will be going on the Pilgrimage to Uganda & Rwanda at the end of the summer.  The past few weeks have been continual blessings and I am just grateful that God is so much smarter and greater than my limited imagination.

Stay tuned.

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